Friday, October 16, 2009

Hard to stay focused

No, i am not writing something negative this morning. I am no longer allowing the myriad of negative thoughts that run through my brain roads to dominate me. The title is just a mindfulness exercise. I am writing something and immediately, i attribute things with it. I write the fact that sometimes it is hard to stay focused. The closet of "you will never make it" or "you used to be so much better at that" or even "if you did this and that it wouldnt be so hard but..." opens. But i read in a mindfulness exercise that there is another closet availabel that you open you put the thought in and you close it. And you go on. Some, including me have no problem in having a lot of available closets for comfortable, pleasing thoughts (which ironically translates in my case into self destructive thoughts because they feel familiar to me) but if it comes to uncomfortable, things, i label them soooooo soon. Yet it is just a thought. One of 60000 a day. Nothing spectacular, nothing special. A thought. Just a thought. So i feel more at peace knowing that it is hard to focus sometimes and that is neither good nor bad it just is. I am curious to find out what other thoughts are going to pop up in my brain today and i am ready to let them go and not holding on to them, trying to figure out in what closet i should put them.
May you have a lot of empty closets that close easily available today.

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