Thursday, March 5, 2009

Have you ever done a task you did not like to do in the first place but then while or after doing it, it turns out that you entire effort was worth nothing... I am sure you have. I had the pleasure to install a microwave today, which took 4 hours only to find out that the door was broken. At least it looked nice.... but i was once again reminded that everything in my life happens for a reason. The lesson i learnt was the following: I am too quick sometimes. I could have done a general check of the parts before starting to install the items. Would have saved me 4 hours of work. I am very impatient therefore I do not like to sit down and be thorough. I did enjoy the 4 hours because it made me realize that i am quite handy. And I know that this is the most important life lesson for me. If i manage to just concentrate on the moment instead of being 2 steps ahead in my thoughts, i actually can find peace in that very moment. I want to learn to now let go of the negative thought that it was all for nothing because that is not true. While I was doing that job I had time to see that it has been a long time since i did something I was truly proud of. I like to be challenged (even if it is only by IKEA instructions or manuals that assume I have studied engineering) but i seek challenges that are too much. Then I get frustrated and instead of lowering my expectations, I use the experience to critize mz inabilities. That has to stop. I did the best job today and yet because of things i cannot control, I didnt achieve the desired result. i cannot rule the world even if i give my best. I have to let go of that need to be perfect and the idea that if i do everything right, the world around me must do the same thing. So i am grateful for the microwave experience because after all that work and finding out that the door did not work i did not get mad (i admit for a split second I did) instead I went upstairs, and did a very easy yoga session. That was very difficult because I wanted to prove myself that i can do much more. This is not healthy for me and therefore i decided to do a basic class. Which was lovely and not too much and I felt renewed and ready to face the kids without being angry at all the malfunctioning microwaves in general and myself in particular. Great day. Hope you had such a lovely experience today too. If not, go buy yourself a new microwave...

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